On my heart...

Man...What a crazy week! Let me just say this, I'm tired and I'm stressed. There's been many of nights when I just stayed up staring at the wall asking myself "Why am I doing this" "What's the benefit" Sometimes I ask myself if this is what I really want...You gotta understand folks, I've been doing this for a long time. I'm not an amateur. I consider myself an unsigned professional. It's hard when you have to get up and make money for someone else for 11 hours a day, when you can be perfecting your craft. I guess that's the gift and the curse of being an artist. Either you focus on your art and be broke, or you work to pay the bills and squeeze your art in when you have the time. It's a trade off. If you ask me if there were or are times when I feel like quitting this and giving it all up...the answer is yes! But for me I can't just quit. Im in too deep and I have too much to lose if I quit. What makes me feel like this is not the art itself, but the business that is injected into the art/music. At the end of the day you have to have a dream. If you don't have a dream, what's the purpose of life? It's either I work and struggle all my life or I try to attain a goal and make myself a success with the talent I was given. But anyways, let me tell you about my week...

Why is it that everytime I try to do a show, everyone wants me to sell some Damn tickets. 20/30 tickets for like 20 bucks...man I'm tired of selling tickets yo. I sold tickets for this FAKE SONY and UNIVERSAL showcase. What did i get out of it, nothing! I sold tickets for Soul Cafe...Nothing. Everybody's tryna make money from this and im Disgusted by it. I tell you what, take them tickets and shove it down your A**...how bout that!

Watch whose close to you: I won't go into too much detail here, but all Im going to say is don't trust no one but GOD. I found out this week that mad people just been talking about me bad behind my back man, just dogging me for no reason. All I do is what I do, why is there beef? Anyways im not getting into that, Ill just hit the gym hard and let my muscles do the talking for me

Yo shout outs to my family. Steve who works just as hard as me to get this done, Matt - yo your getting real good on the guitar man, keep it up. My sister Charmaine, who I'm proud of for being chosen for the Mrs. New Jersey pageant. My Mom and Dad for Working So Hard and Getting the Job done, as well as their compassion and support. Allie - your love and support is unconditonal. Uncle Teddy - you already know what it is. We gone carry the torch yo, all the way...I grew up in a world of champions, and if we are the only champions on the planet, then thats what it is. We the last ones left...